American Dad Wikia
Stan: The Smiths have only ever had very bad, very weird Christmases. So this year, it's imperative that we finally have the perfect Norman Rockwell holiday season.

Francine: I saw that video, and I think it's actually going to be good for him. Dude's got a monster hog.
Klaus: Yeah, but he's got those tiny little balls.
Hayley: Hey, I got time to blast a shit real quick?
Stan: NORMAN ROCKWELL!!

Pear Store Employee: Pleasure doing business with you.
Steve: There was a time when the word "genius" was reserved for the likes of Issac Newton and Zach Braff.

Janitor: [saves Stan a third time] Careful there!
Stan: I've heard of a catching a train, but not with your teeth. Boop!

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