Steve: Anyone else get a boner when Akiko slapped me? ... Uh, me neither. Ha ha, gotta go. Hey, you know what's funny? Walking like a gorilla.
Stan:The truth is you're nothing, but a worthless sack of fat-ass. You're lazy, you're a chubbo, you lie, you cheat, you eat all our food, you're a drunk, you never wash your wigs, but strut around like you're Mary, Queen of Scots, Brangelina and Jesus all rolled into one. Well you're not. You're a big, fat nothing.
Francine: Dinner's almost ready. I'm doing one of Rachael Ray's 30-minute meals, but I'm saving 10 minutes by not being all fake and smiley.
[Steve swallows hot dogs whole]
Steve: Thanks again for training me how to tame my gag reflex.
Roger, Hayley & Francine: You're welcome.
Roger: [After stabbing Stan with his empty epipen during an allergy attack] I only used it once. I was super hungover, and I wanted an adrenaline rush. It... Felt... Amazing.
Roger: [Drinks a cup of coffee] Man, caffeine doesn't affect me at all. [twitches, drops his cup and runs on the ceiling] I can do anything!