- Hayley: [telling Stan about meeting Ice-T] I told him about my passion for women's rights, and he confided in me that he's really good at sex.
- Stan: You wasted your fest.
- [Stan plays the clarinet he stole from the convention]
- Security Guard: I heard it! Play it again, you coward!
- Stan: I'm not a coward, Francine.
- Francine: Then let's blow it together, outlaw. [They kiss while playing the clarinet]
- Steve: Every year.
- Francine: Stan, are you being mean to me right now?
- Stan: I don’t know, Francine. That’s not for me to judge.
- Steve: You spoke to my friends without me?
- Klaus: Yeah, at Toshi’s birthday party. Not the one you went to. The more exclusive one at Benihana. Our parents dropped us off, and we paid the check ourselves.
- Steve: When you said "models", we thought you meant something cool, like Abercrombie or Stussy.
- Barry: Or model airplanes.
- Barry: I feel like I’ve seen something like this done before.
- Klaus: No, no, it’s all original. These are fresh ideas, obviously, Barry. Can you lean in a little? I want to match the image I have in my mind.
- Snot: What a shutter slut.
- Toshi: [in Japanese] When did we all get jealous about this?
- Barry: Don’t hurt me, Anne Geddes! I’m just a baby!
- Anne Geddes: You forgot one thing… I hate babies!
Previous Episode's Quotes /// The Census of the Lambs's Quotes \\\ Next Episode's Quotes
| << Season 12 | American Dad Season 13 | Season 14 >> | ||||||
| #01 | Santa, Schmanta | #09 | The Never-Ending Stories | #16 | Persona Assistant | |||
| #02 | Paranoid Frandroid | #10 | Railroaded | #17 | The Legend of Old Ulysses | |||
| #03 | The Census of the Lambs | #11 | My Purity Ball and Chain | #18 | Twinanigans | |||
| #04 | Shell Game | #12 | OreTron Trail | #19 | Top of the Steve | |||
| #05 | The Mural of the Story | #13 | Mean Francine | #20 | Funnyish Games | |||
| #06 | (You Gotta) Strike For Your Right | #14 | One-Woman Swole | #21 | Fleabiscuit | |||
| #07 | Klaustastrophe.TV | #15 | Flavortown | #22 | The Future is Borax | |||
| #08 | Death by Dinner Party |
| ||||||