- Roger: Oh, Ernest and Julio Gallo, you make a glorious wine, and a handsome couple!
- Steve: Come on, Hayley. You're going to the movies with Jeff, anyway. Just give me a ride.
- Hayley: You know the rule.
- Steve: You're the most environmentally-conscious, self-actualized feminist in the world...
- Hayley: And?
- Steve: And I'm a douchebag.
- Hayley: Steve, come on! I'm supposed to meet the neighbor's son in 20 minutes!
- Steve: You know the rule. Say it, and I'll escort you to the bazaar.
- Hayley: [sighs] "You're the manliest man in the history of manly men."
- Steve: And?
- Hayley: "And when you're in your late 30's, you may have a chance at convincing a long-time female friend to have awkward pity-sex with you once."
- Steve: Oh, yeah!
- Stan: Francine, good news. I'm in charge of planning Bullock's party, which means you're in charge of planning Bullock's party.
- Stan: Damn it. If Francine had been here, she could have started the wave of laughter. Laughter is infectious, like smallpox or gay. She wants to be equal partners, well, I say, no way.
- Steve: How come all the women are dressed like ninjas?
- Hayley: They're wearing abayas. Saudi women aren't objectified like women in Western cultures. The beauty myth doesn't exist here.
- Stan: It doesn't exist in Idaho, either. Why couldn't we go there? Talk about a bunch of dogs.
- Roger: I need a drink. Where's the booze?
- Hayley: There is no booze. Saudi Arabia is a dry country.
- Roger: Seriously, where's the booze?
- Steve: My childhood died on July 18, 2003, the day Kobe Bean Bryant was charged with sexual assault.
- Francine: Steve...
- Steve: Why was he even in Colorado in the first place? Black man don't go to Colorado.
- Stan: Now, I've installed extra locks on the doors and windows so you won't get beheaded while I'm out.
- Francine: Stan?
- Stan: Way ahead of you. I'll find us a satellite so we can watch Lost when I get home. Just because we're stuck in this wasteland doesn't mean it's not Wednesday.
- Hayley: Jeff, that's a corndog. We're vegetarian.
- Jeff: [eating] Still?
- Roger: Does this furniture polish have alcohol in it? [drinks it] Mmmmmm... tastes like I might die.
- Stan: Roger, have you seen Francine?
- Roger: [drunk] Not since she came back from the store with this. Look at its magnificent size. I'm completely off my ass, and I'm barely down to the label.
- Stan: One of these days, Francine. One of these days. [shoots gun in the air] Right in the kisser.
- Bullock: I like big Asian butts and I cannot lie.
Previous Episode's Quotes /// Stan of Arabia: Part 1's Quotes \\\ Next Episode's Quotes
| American Dad Season 1 | Season 2 >> | ||||||||||
| #01 | Pilot (American Dad!) | #09 | A Smith In The Hand | #17 | Rough Trade | ||||||
| #02 | Threat Levels | #10 | All About Steve | #18 | Finances With Wolves | ||||||
| #03 | Stan Knows Best | #11 | Con Heir | #19 | It's Good to Be the Queen | ||||||
| #04 | Francine's Flashback | #12 | Stan of Arabia: Part 1 | #20 | Roger 'n' Me | ||||||
| #05 | Roger Codger | #13 | Stan of Arabia: Part 2 | #21 | Helping Handis | ||||||
| #06 | Homeland Insecurity | #14 | Stannie Get Your Gun | #22 | With Friends Like Steve's | ||||||
| #07 | Deacon Stan, Jesus Man | #15 | Star Trek | #23 | Tears of a Clooney | ||||||
| #08 | Bullocks To Stan | #16 | Not Particularly Desperate Housewives |
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