American Dad Wikia
Francine: You just couldn't keep your eyes off that slutty bartender, could you?
Stan: Wait, what? Are you just guessing that she's slutty or have you heard something?

Francine: It's like they say, 'Starve a fever, sleep a concussion'.

Dick: If my girlfriend finds out you're checking out other women, she'll realize I do it too.

Stan: Some from the back, and don't forget the rack.

Stan: He's not gonna find anything. The only evidence is some pictures of that jogger in my phone, which I haven't even looked at since the accident because my phone's in my car. [gasps]
Dick: You brought him in here, you bastard! RUBBERNECKING IS ALL I HAVE!

[Agent Brown answers Stan's phone]
Roger: [speaking in a Southern accent for his Jean Louise disguise] Stan? I lied, Stan. Klaus didn't spill the wine - we both did. I had to tell you 'cause it's the truth. And if we ain't got no truth in this world, what do we have?
Agent Brown: Damn lies.
Roger: [suddenly speaking in his normal voice] You're not Stan. How'd you get Stan's phone? What else of Stan's do you have? Let's sell it all and split the dough. We're in this together, don't you dare double cross me!

Stan: [interrupting Steve's singing] Steve! Seriously, this isn't a great place not to be wearing a shirt. [Camera pans to a group of prisoners pressing their faces against the glass, ogling at a shirtless Steve]
Prison Inmate: Let him sing!

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