American Dad Wikia
Roger: [On putting a Trans Am engine in a power washer] I souped it up with a little alien tech. By alien, I mean Detroit. Let's turn this country around. Let's make things again.

Roger: Not used to holding a tool with that kind of power, Stan? I'm kidding. I've seen yours while you were sleeping. It's great.

Steve: White, dusty oil?
Francine: Lawn dandruff?
Klaus: A third ridiculous guest?

Stan: Hear that? I'm gonna have a big, veiny shaft!

Steve: This is a contract signed eight years ago transferring all mineral rights on our property from Dad to me.
Francine: How is it possible?
Stan: [sighs] I can explain...
Steve: Uh-uh. You think I brought you to my room so you could do the talking?

[Young Steve admires the rocks holding his last treasure clue]
Steve: They're so shiny!
Stan: So's Hayley's forehead, but you wouldn't call that a treasure.

Klaus: [Regarding Steve's mineral rights deed] Yep, it's official. And if anyone knows what's official, it's a fish, y'all!

Gordon Salt executive: I respect the sexual frustration behind your decision.

Stan: Okay, you're making me look bad, Steve, 'cause after you called me a sucker, I definitely threw you in the pool, 'cause I don't take that shit.

[As Roger directs Steve as he signs his cast]
Roger: Gotta leave room for Zachary and Ella. I'm gonna have 'em sign next to each other 'cause then when I break them up, Ella's gonna cry every time she sees my cast, and I'm gonna love it 'cause she was such a bitch to me at the lockers last week.
Steve: I know this is all made up.
Roger: Some of it.

Teacher: Nice try, Steve, but us adults stick together.

Previous Episode's Quotes /// Mine Struggle's Quotes \\\ Next Episode's Quotes