"I Want A Wife (Not A Partner)" is Stan's fantasy number in "Stan of Arabia: Part 1" when he dreams of having his family, particularly Francine, wait on him hand and foot.
Lyrics[]
Stan: Dammit! If Francine had been here, she could've started the wave of laughter. Laughter is infectious like small pox or gay. She wants to be equal partners? Well, I say no way!
I don't want a partner, I want a wife
Someone who's happy taking care of my life
Where's my Edith Bunker, Laura Petrie, Wilma Flintstone?
Edith: I would never let Archie go to a party alone.
Stan: I want to go back, to a simpler time
When men were men and women had no say
Content to love, honor and obey
I want to be greeted with a massage and a martini
The way master was by his Genie-e-e-e-e
I don't buy this independence and doing your own thing
I want a woman to make me feel like a king
This ship is sinking and I'm swimming for my li-i-i-i-i-ife
I don't want a partner... damn it!
I want a wi-i-i-i-i-i-i-ife
Oh, did I just sing my way in here?
Woman: Yes, please, just take what you want and leave.
Girl: Are we gonna die, Mommy?
Woman: Yes, Brandy.