For a complete script, see: "Familyland" on the Transcripts Wiki

PA Announcement: Attention "Familyland" patrons, "Familyland" is temporarily closed...[foreboding voice] FOREVER.

Francine: Real great park, Roy. Familyland, my ass!

Roy: They stopped fighting! What did you do?
Francine: I baked my ass off.

[Bullock cuts someone in line]
Kid: Hey, you're cutting!
Bullock: [pulls out knife] How about I show you what real cutting is, huh?
Kid: I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you. Can you speak into my microphone? [pulls out gun]
Bullock: [backing away] Whoa, things just got real!

Steve : It was worth it! It was all worth it!

Stan: What's that smell?
Roger: Cinnamon.
Steve: Are those Mom's cookies?
Hayley: I don't know, but it smells like...
Hayley, Steve, and Stan: Home.
Roger: Michael Chiklis.

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