To start a complete script, see: "Bush Comes to Dinner" on the Transcripts Wiki


Hayley: [weakly] ...blood for oil...
Stan: Uh. Sounds like someone needs their after dinner walk. Steve, help me put your sister in the pit of no return.

Stan: Ah pillow gun, where danger and comfort meet, 200 thread count, 200 dead count.

Roger-steve-kidney-bush-comes-to-dinner.png
Steve: Roger, why am I in a bathtub full of ice?
Roger: Shh, my baby. [pulls out a knife] Everything's gonna be fine.
Steve: Aah! What the hell are you doing?!
Roger: Hm? Oh, I'm harvesting one of your kidneys to sell on the black market. Then I'm gonna buy Dollywood.
Steve: Dollywood?
Roger: Dolly Parton's theme park! The rides give you the same experience as looking at her. Fun from far away, but really scary up close. Anyway, it's on sale for 50 million dollars.
Steve: You moron! You can't get 50 million dollars for a kidney!
Roger: Just once, would it kill you to say, "Good idea, Roger"?
[Roger throws down the knife in disgust. Steve stands up and discovers that Roger drew lines on his body representing other internal organs. Roger returns and pulls out a bottle of vodka from the tub.]
Roger: This was to celebrate!

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