Darnell

Darnell is a former boyfriend of Hayley's that Stan placed into a fake witness protection program.

When Steve finds his unmailed letters to Snot in "Why Can't We Be Friends?" after Stan arranged the same scheme when he believes Snot isn't good for his son, Hayley tells him of how Stan had him witness a fake murder and placed him in hiding in an apartment building in Lanceton the same as Snot. When Steve arrives at the building, he finds Snot and Stan playing air guitar after bonding the night before. Darnell pokes his head in while wearing a blond wig similar to one Snot was given to pass himself off as Swedish to see if its safe to come out of hiding and Stan replies with "nope.".