Things You Must Not Touch

"Things You Must Not Touch" is a song on the The Gentle Bearded Christian Sing-Along Hour that Stan creates when he takes over W-ANG Studios in "A Smith In The Hand". When Stan convinces the senate that television is responsible for masturbation, he replaces the station's regular content with 'Clean TV'. The song uses the melody of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.

Lyrics
Stan: Lava, acid and your crotch

These are things you must not touch

Take it, son

Steve: Rest assured your eyes will melt

If you drift below the belt