Stelio

When Stan tries to toughen up Steve in "Bully for Steve", he recounts his beatings at the hand of Stelio Kontos which stopped when Stelio moved away. When Steve gets tired of being pushed around by Stan, he locates Stelio at a Kinko's copy store and hires him to beat up Stan until he surrenders and agrees to quit picking on Steve. During the fight, a chorus sings "Stelio" until Stelio finally stops the recording.

Stelio and his theme song return in "The Full Cognitive Redaction of Avery Bullock by the Coward Stan Smith" when Roger hires Stelio to beat Steve up before getting beat by Luis Ramirez, using the logic that Luis would refuse Stelio's "sloppy seconds." While Stelio beats Steve, Roger dances and sings along to the theme song. When Luis actually rejects beating up Steve, he tries to turn him against Stelio, but when he meet him he fawns over the "legendary" Stelio and they record a new version of the theme song at Responzible Recordz with an additional singer adding "...and Luis."

Lyrics
Chorus: Stelio!!

Stelio Kontos!

Stelio!!

Stelio Kontos!

Steve: I found him on Facebook and it got me thinking; Why do you care how I get those oranges up the stairs? I can pay someone to bring them up for me. Just like I'm paying Stelio to kick your ass.

Chorus: Stelio!!

Stelio Kontos!

Stelio!!

Stelio Kontos!

Stan: No. You're not doing it yourself Steve. So it doesn't count.

Steve: Really. Sure looks like it counts to me.

(Stelio beats on Stan)

You know what dad? You tell me when you feel I've gotten those oranges up the stairs, ok?

Chorus: Stelio!!

Stelio Kontos!

Stelio!!

Stan: No! Not the slidakopita

Stelio Kontos!

Stelio!!

Stelio Kontos!

(Stelio runs away briefly before returning)

Stan: Oh thank God, Oh thank God its over.

Stelio!!

Oh no! he's coming from so far away!

Stelio Kontos!

Stelio!!

He's picking up so much speed!

Stelio!!

Stelio Kontos!

Stelio!!

(Stelio jumps and lands on Stan)

Stelio!!

Stelio!!

Stan: (Surrendering) They're up the stairs! For the love of God you got the oranges up the stairs!

Stelio!!

Stelio Kontos!

Stelio!!

Stel...

Stelio stops the recording